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Florence + The Machine “Spectrum”
Ever so sorry I failed to read the instructions
Was not made aware that I’d been programmed to function
Bear with me a moment while I find my lost bearings
Tell you what, you go on and we shall readjourn at the very next junction
They call it the crossroads I hear
Compunction is the common ground to all who come here
As they wrestle the dread of the great unknown ahead
While they attempt to turn their backs on any worst fears that led them here
Little rest for the wicked it appears
But here’s the thing
You see, we made it this far
May not be in the clear yet
But we are getting there
Granted, the path has been fraught with great peril
But then, when is the path not fraught with great peril
Nobody ever said it would be easy
No wait, yes they did
And Once upon a time
that would have made me uneasy
But you see, I owe my child-like innocence to child-like innocence
Couldn’t blame them for keeping me chipper
After all, we grow up so quickly nowadays
And life takes no names as it whips us into shape and smacks us on the kisser
The thing is, I’m no longer a wide-eyed child
Learned the hard way that I was bound for exile
This jagged little pill
Got lodged in my throat
As I choked back the bile of bitter truths it imparted
Handed me a brush and told me how to stroke
Suffer for thou art
For you no longer figure in our plans
You are goddamn right I’d been shafted
Talk about the ultimate sting
No gold watch for service distinguished
Simply fuck off and die
And please do so quietly
A more violent approach would at least have been sincere
Knew there was a reason why I had learned to live with fear
Why every time society told me I couldn’t
I did anyway
Just to see if they reacted
Left it bloody late is all I can say
And for a fair old while there
They had me thoroughly distracted
But they made one critical mistake
When they chose to underestimate this broken little soldier
And signed me off for imminent foreclosure
Wasn’t done yet, you see
Though my pulse may well have been weak
I refused to believe that the detestable sights I had seen
Would define me
They would no doubt sideline me
With immediate effect
And duration unclear
But the thing about fear is that it lessens over time
And there is far less to fear
Once aware of what you’re fighting
May not have invited this foe
But it found me regardless
Had studied my form
Knew where to hit hardest
What it hadn’t taken time to consider however
Was that I too had been playing apt pupil
Learning each rope as it burned my wrists raw
Figuring out when to dodge the southpaw
How to pick myself up from the floor every time
And cry “Have at you”
Had nothing to lose way back when I lost it
Then I found something true
Thus, there is nothing to lose
I may bruise with ease
But my bones fracture not
And should my shoulder see fit to pop out of its joint
Then, I shall pop it back in with the minimum of fuss
For I am made of stern stuff
And have learned more than enough to tough this out without complaint
No stranger to danger or pain
But I know how to fade it to grey
As for any white noise
Well I fade that to black
Allow my eyes to recline in Cimmerian Shade
And it swiftly goes away
I’ve been down many times
But I have never ever been out
Better yet, I’m devout to braving this out
Shall not accept defeat
What can I say
It’s the Spartan in me
And this blood it runs deep
To the particles of me
And a most significant other besides
Thus, I shall rise with liberty
When the time it is right
But until such a time as that one day arrives
I know I shall be just fine
Richard Charles Stevens
Keeper of The Crimson Quill
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