Drum Roll

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N.E.R.D. “Lapdance (Instrumental)”

What say we cut directly to the chase?
You see, of all the things in greykeeper’s possession
One is not a solitary second to waste
on gracing an answer to dumb fucking questions from humdrum debasers making haste to disgrace us on account of our bad taste

Anyone would think we took a steaming piss in their face
the way their eyes start to roll when we say things as they are
They think we’ve lost control when they couldn’t actually be any farther from the truth
We know precisely what we’re doing and it doesn’t take a sleuth to suss
that while we may appear uncouth
we are anything but aloof and you can trust us

We are soon to be inviting you down a series of rather dark rabbit hOles
And a thick skin is compulsory if you wish to get the most from them
This may entail taking old wounds which never quite healed and groping them til we reopen them
But grit your teeth and you will see we have the analgesic properties of opium

You see, it’s all about the pain-relief and calling out those vain beliefs
The ones ingrained which trick our brains into believing there is no cure for our disease
For all our homicidal tendencies, greykeeper aim to please
As we have seen all sorts of funny games
and take to the fray like trained elites just to obtain release

If a problem shared is one halved
then any grievances aired should clear at least half a path
Granted, this may result in a vague aftermath
And some of our prose may well stick in your throat
But this doesn’t denote that we’re sitting here gloating
over how many skulls we fucked through via remote

We wouldn’t devote so much time to our art
If we didn’t have a heart
But you have to be prepared to play Martyr
When your period results in Stigmata
And we grew weary of this dreary shit
Back when we discovered that we nearly fit
and were severely hit by being dearly missed
Like we no longer fucking existed

We sincerely wish to hack a few things off our chest
And would be best observed without the test conditions
If Edwin Starr was bang on point and war is good for nothing
Then where’s the sense in whoring out attrition?

Unless we’re missing a trick here,
there is no sense without feeling
And you may wish to hang onto that tight when our straight-facts leave you reeling
Payback doesn’t date back like estate tax
greykeeper are way too laid back for all of that crap
We don’t hold onto claptrap any more than our bad raps make us backtrack
Would much rather take a cat nap and let the rat traps snap

After so long trapped like gas
Feels good to release the valve some
And we would do the very same thing again
Regardless of the outcome
Think of us like American Express and don’t leave home without us
But pay no mind to the doubters as they don’t know what devout is

We have no intention of outing anybody
That’s not what this is about in the slightest
Wrong damn prognosis
But there are itches to scratch and the blueprints happen to match our sclerosis

Like flea-bitten mules encrusted in jewels
We must have been fools to misplace all those life tools
But all’s well that ends well
As we hoarded those fuckers
And now we get to fight tooth and nail for the right cause

This might cause a fair few raised eyebrows
But don’t even think of placing us in time out because you don’t like the way we describe nouns
Our theory just happens to be nothing less than sound
And we’re clearly profound in our thinking
So what say you skip second thinking and drink in the ink from our quill
Not like we’re hoodwinking as we stare without blinking
And the last thing we wish for is to see your ship sinking

Shrinking violets aren’t the targets for our violence
It’s society that harmed us
And unwittingly armed us
Besides, we’re mostly harmless unless you ruffle our feathers
And in a roundabout way desire to make the world a little better
Admittedly our words can result in a mass of twisted metal
But there is beauty in the wreckage once you have some breakdown cover

You can stake us out and try to shake us down but greykeeper spread like cooties when you break us down
No time to play this down
No need to scale this down
No point in laying face down
Much rather nail this down

We’ve suffered plenty of knock downs
Been disgraced and placed in lockdown
But we’re not about to drop out
As we are aiming for the top now
And if we wind up in the flop house
Well then at least we didn’t cop-out

We may well be troubled souls
But we are true to the grue
No less than stubborn to our goals
So what say we get to the drum roll

Richard Charles Stevens

Keeper of The Crimson Quill