Suggested Audio Candy

 

Ultravox “Dancing With Tears In My Eyes”

 

Delilah had been so stoked about the weekend. All week she had been famished; several bloody steaks had done little to sate her ever-growing appetite and she had never felt quite this hungry. Even Eloise had begun to grow exasperated about her incessant whining. She was ravenous too but at least she held it together whereas her friend was practically bleeding from the eyes for another feeding time. After what felt like forever Saturday had come around and her mood had started to lift. She had every intention of licking the bones dry this time and there would unlikely be much to dispose of by the time she had taken her fill.

At the bar it was slim pickings. The girls looked fine, Eloise was clad in a PVC catsuit and Delilah a dress so short that it barely covered her ass. Unfortunately it was the grand opening of a club called Teasers a couple of kilometres out-of-town and word had clearly spread far and wide, leaving their regular haunt pretty much uninhabited. There was this one guy, sat on his lonesome at the bar knocking back shots, but considering they had fasted all week this wasn’t an ideal state of affairs. Plus, he hadn’t so much as acknowledged their existence the whole time.

At one point, Delilah had ordered drinks right beside him and he hadn’t taken a blind bit of notice. Things were beginning to look desperate and Eloise could see her friend becoming ever edgier as the evening began to draw to a close. “Looks like we’re shit out of luck” she sighed uncharacteristically defeated and instantly Delilah came back with a cutting retort. “No Els, we’re not shit out of luck. It was your ingenious idea to come back here. This is your mess so sort it!” This took her somewhat by surprise but she wasn’t about to lie down and let her friend dictate to her. “Listen to me. You are acting like a twat and I’m not your bitch. What do you expect, for me to magic up a couple of guys because I can assure you that magic isn’t my thing bitch”.

“I am being a twat aren’t I?” Delilah was big enough to admit she’d spoken out of turn and tried a more tactile approach “…I have never been so hungry in my life. If I don’t eat tonight I don’t know what I’ll do”. Eloise spotted that her voice was beginning to crack and took pity on her as she generally always did. “Sweetheart. This is me, I’m feeling exactly how you do. I’m disappointed too but there isn’t a whole lot I can do to solve the problem. I’m sorry”. “What about him?” Ellie gestured to Bobby-no-Pals propping up the bar. “He’s gay, I already asked Mike”. Mike was the bar manager and knew this instinctively as he too preferred his Steves to his Eves. Apparently it was blatantly obvious but neither girl had seen any signs.

“Guess our gaydars are a little off” She made light, not because she felt any less twisted up inside but because she could clearly see that Delilah was taking the news badly and damage limitation was her specialty. “I’d say they were. We’re either losing our touch or our minds” was her eventual response. “Honey, my mind was lost the first time I walked past a lamppost and had the overwhelming urge to take a piss up it. Don’t know about you”. “Nice try Els, and I appreciate your attempt, really I do. Bottom line though, this place is getting ready to close and we ain’t getting any”.

With that, the last bell tolled and they decided to cut their losses. Neither were aware that Teasers was literally heaving just a few miles away as nobody had seen fit to offer this information and the streets were ordinarily barren by the time the doors shut here. “Let’s grab one more drink, knock it back and then consider our options” Eloise suggested and Delilah nodded reluctantly in agreement, not having a more appealing plan of her own. She reached into her purse and handed her a twenty. “My round Els”. “Thanks sugar tits”. She strode back to the bar, minus the provocative sway she had provided earlier and instead lurching like an urchin, dejected and fading fast.

“Mike, can I ask you something?” “Shoot” he replied, washing up the last few glasses and preparing to turn off the neon signage. “If you liked women would you find us attractive?” He chuckled to himself “I do like women and yes I’d tap both your asses if that’s what you’re asking.” “Hold on… reel yourself back a second. But you’re gay”. He laughed again “Thanks for the prognosis but I like to think of myself as bisexual.” Two prime ribs popped straight up in her eyes and suddenly Mike was beginning to look mighty succulent.

Her first thought was how delighted Delilah would be to find out the news, her second was that he had just clearly stated that he would fuck both girls. Unfortunately conscience got the better of Eloise at that point as her third consideration was that Mike was a really lovely guy. When she had been flat broke he had offered drinks on the house and when her boiler went up the wall he called his brother who came round the same day to fix it. Actually, his brother was a complete asshole and it was a shame it wasn’t him practically propositioning her.

She had to think on the move as she could feel Delilah’s eyes burning into the back of her neck and could almost hear her slobbering. “Er…thanks Mike. You’re too sweet” she said, cutting the conversation short and grabbing the final two shots of the night. She looked over at her withering friend who looked like she had been fasting for the past six weeks and was appearing more desperate by the second. She knew she couldn’t make mention of this tête-à-tête to Delilah as she would potentially lunge across the bar and take a bite straight out of him, the way things were heading.

Sure, they’d eat and the other gay dude was still propped up on his bar stool so they’d both get a free course. Nobody else was here, it offered a quick solution but it would also mean that they would have to leave town pronto and there would be plenty of heat for them considering the overlooked locale was right on the main boulevard. She gave a half-hearted smile and walked back over to the table to drown her sorrows. “I’ve got a question for you Els, I’ve just realized the time. Full moon has been up for hours and look, no hairy palms”. “You’ve only just fell in sweetie…” she replied almost condescendingly “…I don’t think those rules apply for us”. “What do you mean?” quizzed Delilah. “I mean, the movies are just movies. We got a whole different strain here”.

She spent the next five minutes explaining to Delilah that she controlled when and where she turned and not, as expected, the sickness. By the time the penny had dropped Mike was calling time and it was time to hit the skids. Eloise felt a little guilty for not divulging Mike’s orientation but was sure it was for the best. Besides, his meat just wouldn’t taste right. It’d be too much like kicking a kitten and she’d always been an animal lover. “See ya girls” he called after them and neither could muster any more than a feeble side wave with faces firmly forward. They exited the bar and, sure enough, the streets were bare. “Strap-on?” Ellie suggested as consolation but Delilah didn’t even grace it with a reply. She just felt like curling up and dying.

About three hundred yards down the road they both discerned oncoming headlights and were even more thrilled to see them slowing as they advanced, then pulling to a halt alongside them. The window unwound and a good-looking guy in his mid-thirties gave them a cheesy grin. Dancing With Tears in My Eyes by Ultravox was his selected audio and he wore a black satin shirt unbuttoned virtually to his gut and a cheap looking gold medallion around his neck, resting against his chest hair. Delilah looked up at the skies and mouthed the words “thank you God” while Eloise gleefully pondered how much fun it would be killing this bag of douche.

“You ladies still taking orders?..” What a slimy opener she considered but the tang of his flesh was too hot in her nostrils to give a hoot “…you’re hookers right?” Firstly, how very dare he jump to such a conclusion just by looking at them. Secondly, yes they were hookers so kudos on the presumption. Thirdly, Eloise had been on the job for seven years and that was the first time anybody had actually attempted to pick her up in the street. “Yeah, we’re hookers. Hungry, ravenous hookers. Can we play with you?” “How much is this gonna set me back?” he asked rather to the point. “You get the special baby…” Delilah piped up “… $150 for both of us and we’ll give you a night you’ll remember for the rest of your life. That I assure you”.

Eloise was incensed by being pimped out like that and $150 was very much below the asking rate. “Fuck sake D. Firstly, if I needed a pimp I’d have one already and secondly…” she whispered the remainder of the sentence “… look at this bag of dicks. He’s got five times as much money as brain cells”. “Er… I’m waiting here. Once you two stop bashing titties can we just get on to the fucking?” “Stay out of this you fucking plankton” Eloise barked. “What you got to say Delilah?” Her friend simply rolled her eyes before muttering her response. “It doesn’t matter about the money you dozy slag. We take whatever he’s got in his wallet anyway”. Eloise felt instantly foolish but had the bit between her teeth and refused to back down. “It’s the principal…” she moaned before her features lit up once again “… but I do love it when you call me slag”. They looked at each other, screaming “Slag!!!” in unison and burst into outright rapture.

“Excuse me? Slags is it? This is all very cute but right now I’ve got a dick which ain’t sucking itself. Just saying”. Delilah and Eloise turned back to one another, synchronized grins and eyebrows raised in excitement. Delilah replied first this time. “Your mother know you’re so bad?” “Yeah! She hooks my shit up”. It just got better and better, this guy probably still lived with his parents. What an absolute non-entity, nothing beyond the peepers and more dense than a blimp filled with spam. “You gonna sit there charming us all night or are we going to sit on your face and blow raspberries?” He beamed and gestured toward the back door. “Get in”. That was probably the only shrewd thing he’d said and they procrastinated not in taking him up on his offer.

Eloise leaned forward from the back seat. “We have a place three blocks from here. I’ll direct you there”. “Groovy”. ‘Fucking groovy’ she thought. Was this guy for real? Maybe they’d passed out at the bar and this was all an elaborate phantasm. They were back in no time and all either girl could think the whole journey was how much this particular piece of work had to get it bad…real REAL bad. As they entered her domicile and Eloise went to close the door she froze for a second in her tracks. Her instincts were ordinarily strong and she definitely felt another presence. It felt suspiciously like somebody was watching her from an unseen vantage. She put it down to her cravings and shut the door. A hundred feet away, something was rustling from within the foliage.

 

Click here to read Exposé

 

 

Sins behind closed doors,

 

Keeper of the Crimson Quill

Copyright: Crimson Quill: Savage Vault Enterprises 2014